In the first part of this mini-course, we learned that listening is very important for effective communication.

Challenge 4

Translate your (and others) complaints and criticism in specific requests, and to explain your requests. To obtain more cooperation from the other, whenever possible, ask what you want from the specific, action-oriented, positive language rather than through the use of generalizations, “why , “” Don’ts “or” someone should’s. “Help your listeners explaining fulfill your requests with a” so that …”, “help me … If you want …” or “so ….” Similarly, when you receive criticism and complaints from others, translate and reformulate the request as a request for action. …. “).

Challenge 5

Ask questions more “openendedly” and more creative. “Openendedly …”:

In order to coordinate our work with life and the lives and work of others, we all need to know more about what other people are feeling and thinking, wanting and planning. But our usual “yes / no” in fact people tend to be closed rather than open. To encourage your conversation partners to share more of their thoughts and feelings, to ask “open-ended” rather than “yes / no”. Open-ended questions allow a wide range of responses. For example, by asking, “How did you get that food / cinema / speeches / doctor / etc.” Promote a more detailed response, “Did you like?” (Who could be answered with a simple “yes” or “no”). In the first part of the Challenge Five, we explore calling for a broad range of open-ended questions.

“And more creative …” When we ask questions, we use a powerful tool for language conversation to focus our attention and guide interactions with others. But many of the issues that we have learned to ask are totally sterile and self-defeating (for example, parents of a pregnant teenager, “Why ???!!! Why have you done this to us? ??!!!”). Normally, it would be more fruitful to ask “how” questions about the future rather than the “why” questions about the past, but there are many more creative possibilities that

Good. Billions of questions one might ask, all are not as successful or insightful, all are not as useful for solving problems together. In the second part of Challenge Five explore we call creative force with the questions many areas of life.

Challenge 6

Express more satisfaction.

Building more satisfying relationships with the people around you, express more satisfaction, pleasure, affirmation, encouragement and recognition. Because life compels us constantly to attend to problems and outages, it is very easy to see in life what is broken and must be fixed. But fulfilling relationships (and a happy life) require us to notice and respond to what is pleasant, excellent, pleasant to work, to food well cooked… It is the appreciation that made a relationship strong enough to accommodate differences and disagreements. Some thinkers and researchers in different fields have reached similar conclusions on this subject: healthy relationships need a basis of mutual appreciation.

Challenge 7

Adopt the “continuing education” approach to life, which makes improving communication an important part of your daily life. To get your new communication skills available in a wide variety of situations, you need to put them into practice in such a variety of situations as possible until, as driving a vehicle or bicycle, they become ” second nature. ” The seventh Challenge To practice your evolving communication skills in daily life, solving problems together, giving emotional support to important people in your life, and we appreciate the way you become a positive influence in Your World. This challenge is learning to see every conversation as an opportunity to grow in skills and awareness, every encounter as an opportunity to express more satisfaction, each argument as an opportunity to translate queries in the complaints, and so on.

Although I have a long road ahead of me to become a master of communication, I think that communication is an integral part of any relationship, be it at home, with friends, or at work. Research has always shown that a deficiency in this skills can completely ruin relationships. The foundation strong interpersonal skills is not just to make you hear, but also an understanding of where other people are coming from.

Technorati Tags: personal development, communication, relationships

Communicating with others is a critical skill in business relationships, family, and romantic relationships, and is an essential part of any development effort. Do you find yourself often scorns others? Do you find it difficult to get your point across clearly? When it comes to communication, what you say and what you do not say is equally important. Being a good listener is absolutely crucial.

I decided to note my own skills with an online test. Here’s what I discovered: “Your results show that you sometimes have difficulty interpreting other people’s words and actions and to see things from their perspective. This can sometimes lead to misunderstandings. Remember that knowledge is an essential part of good interpersonal skills, must fit in the shoes of other people and a sense of what they feel, you can better understand them. With a little insight, you will be able to find out if someone does not understand what you are saying or if they are uneasy about a certain subject, and therefore adjust your behavior accordingly. Although you can usually sense what others feel and relatively well thought out, there is some room for improvement. There may be times when you pay more attention to the message you send, rather than how it is received. With a little time and experience, you will probably be able to further improve your vision. ”

Although some of the things said to me this test were hurtful, they are true. I have a lot of work to do in the learning and practice my communication skills - most of us do. Unfortunately, it is easier said than done. As with most personal skills, communication can not be taught. The practice is essential, as you may know what to do logically, but this logic, a lot of time is very difficult. It is possible, however, with a lot of repetitions, change your habits good communication skills. Especially because our personal relations are very important for us, we must be very conscious of how we communicate.

In my quest to become a better communicator, I came across a few things that I will have to overcome before they can:

Challenge 1

Listen more carefully and answer. Listen first and recognize what you hear, even if you disagree with him, before expressing your experience or point of view. For further your conversation partner of the attention in tense situations, be careful when first listening, and give a brief restatement of what you have heard (especially feelings) before you express your own needs or position. The kind of listening here between recognizing recommended approval or acceptance.

Recognizing another person’s thoughts and feelings does not necessarily mean that you approve or agree with the actions of that person or way of life, or that you are going to do what someone asks.

Challenge 2

Explain your intention to invite conversation and consent. To help your conversation partner cooperate with you and to reduce possible misunderstandings, important conversations begin by inviting your conversation partner to join you in the exact type of conversation that you want to do. More conversation will mean for you, the more important it is for your conversation partner to understand the overall situation. Many successful communicators begin conversations with a preface that goes something like: “I would like to talk with you for a few minutes about [material]. When the right time? “The exercise of this step would encourage you to expand your list of conversations and practice from a wide range of them.

Challenge 3

You express more clearly and completely. Slow down and give your listeners more information on what you experience with a wide range of “I-statements. “One way to help them get more from listening to your empathy is to express more of the five basic dimensions of your experience: Here is an example using one of the top five” I-messages “identified by various researchers During the last half-century: What are you seeing, hearing or non-detection? / “When I saw the dishes in the sink …”

Anytime a person sincerely listen to the other, a process of creation is under way in which the listener mentally he rebuilt from the experience. Other facets and dimensions of your experience that you share with easy to understand “I” statements, the easier it is for your conversation partner to rebuild your experience and understand exactly how you feel. This is also useful if you try solve a problem with someone, or attempt to express my appreciation for them. Expressing this treatment can seem to take more time than usual fast your communication style. But if you include all the time it takes to restore the daily lives of misunderstandings, and work through the feelings that accompany them not to be understood to express themselves more fully can actually take a lot less time.

We are halfway in this mini-course. Tomorrow we will continue our mastery of Communication 101.

Technorati Tags: personal development, communication, relationships

Personal Development

Jordan Shannon presents How Positive Thinking Works | Self Development Blog posted at Self Development Blog.

ananga presents Get yourself in a state! posted at Answers from Ayurveda.

Alvin Soon presents Are You Fighting Yourself? posted at Life Coaches Blog.

Think Happy Thoughts Happiness Blog presents Look for What You Want to Find posted at Miguel Trujillo, saying, “How your brain can help you find happiness.”

Self Improvement

Karen Lynch presents The Best You posted at LivethePower.

Victor Fam presents Personal Development Articles » Archive » Making Decisions with Less the Stress posted at Personal Development Articles.

Business

Charles H. Green presents I’m OK, You’re an Idiot posted at Trust Matters, saying, “I’m an idiot, you’re an idiot. So let’s get over it, let’s work together and let’s do something great.”

Susan Velez presents The Truths To Starting A Home Business posted at The Secret To Life, saying, “Change lives with a personal development business;income opportunity. The opportunity to make six figures from home.”

David Maister presents Relationships and Romance posted at Passion, People and Principles, saying, “How to improve your business and personal relationships with the Six Rules of Romance”

Self Improvement

John presents Are you happy? posted at OhCash.com, saying, “What’s the point of living if you’re not happy? All the cash in the world will not bring you happiness if you don’t know how to live.”

Talina presents The biggest lesson I have learned in 2006 posted at Harvest of Daily Life.

Kavit Haria presents How To Deal With Choice Overload posted at Kavit’s Letters, Thoughts and Musings.

Victor presents Personal Development Articles » Archive » Eliminate Procrastination, Now! posted at Personal Development Articles.

Shamelle presents Dale Carnegie Guide To A Happier YOU posted at Enhance Life.

Chris presents Social Skills And How To Improve Them posted at How to be Cooler.

Success

John presents Know Your Sacrifices posted at OhCash.com, saying, “Starting a business takes a lot of sacrifices, and everybody knows this. But what exactly are these sacrifices and how to deal with them?”

Alan presents The Likeable Factor - Do your clients like you? posted at Made to Be Great.

Alan presents Your True Inner Potential posted at Made to Be Great.

That concludes this edition. Submit your blog article to the next edition of personal development burst using our carnival submission form. Past posts and future hosts can be found on our blog carnival index page.

Technorati tags: personal development burst, blog carnival. ]]> http://burstcreativity.com/word/2007/02/03/personal-development-burst-2nd-edition-2/feed/ http://burstcreativity.com/word/2006/12/14/success-secrets-explained/ http://burstcreativity.com/word/2006/12/14/success-secrets-explained/#comments Thu, 14 Dec 2006 16:48:44 +0000 almomento Self Improvement Success Learning Business Personal Development Creativity Passion http://burstcreativity.com/word/2006/12/14/success-secrets-explained/ How do you define success? Is it having a lot of money? May be it is defined as being fulfilled in a relationship or family life. Everybody defines success differently, and there is nothing wrong with our own personal definition. Every one of us feels like we succeed in different ways.

We can however put some broad definitions to the term success that would apply to most people.

One of such definitions would be financial success. I define it as the ability to live a financially worry free life. For some people this might mean that they would be happy to make enough money to survive and others might want to have an extravagant life style. There isn’t really a right or wrong answer. It all depends on what is important to us.

I think that even a better definition of success would be living as close to your true destiny as possible. Here are a few tips for discovering what your true destiny is.

1. Know your dreams.
It isn’t enough to just have goals in life. We often know the direction we want to go to, but do not know where exactly that direction will bring us. Knowing exactly what you want is a key component in designing our destiny.

2. Live your dreams.
Living your dreams is a must. All our happiness depends on how close we come to living our true desires. Think about it. Do you think you would be happier if you were to experience what you truly desire in your day to day life?

3. Take responsibility for your life.

Part of being truly successful is being responsible for the way we act. We all know that things do not always workout the way we want them to. Sometimes we make mistakes. Admitting when we did make a mistake can do great things for us. This ability is crucial when learning anything. When we admit to a mistake we learn from it and are able to move on without hindering our progress. It is being stubborn that prevents us from learning the lessons we need to learn.

4. Let go of any hurt you might have experienced in the past.

If there is one thing that holds us back in life, it is when we hold on to the past. We all experience terrible injustices at one time or another. There are times when we get hurt and go through what seems like incredible difficulties. The sooner we will develop the ability to let go of anything that happened in the past, the more our life will seem successful to us. The easier it will become.
5. Make a plan and stick with it.

Goals are important, but so is action. We must have a plan and follow it to reach a desired destination. Action is of paramount importance. Without acting we will never be able to get anywhere. So make a plan, and follow it with abandon.

Success will come to those who are able to act fearlessly in the face of adversities life troughs at us every day.

1. Only special talented people are creative.

While it is true that it seems like people like Mozart or Picasso are more creative then others, if looked at closer, their creative genius will reveal a lot of very hard work, rather then innate talent. Usually people, who demonstrate higher then average creative abilities, also work much harder then the average person.

2. Being creative is hard.

Yes it is. Actually it isn’t being creative that is hard, it is working on developing that ability. Once we learn how to easily channel creativity, it becomes second nature to us, as easy as breathing.

3. Problems are in our life to make it more difficult.

Problems of any kind are the key to learning. No matter how unpleasant they might be, we learn from every problem we encounter in our life. By using creative problem solving, we not only find the solutions to the dilemma we are facing, but also develop our creativity in the process. Without problems in our life, we would not advance as a society. Problems force us to find solutions and improve our life as a result.

4. I am not creative.

There is no such thing as people who are not creative. If you feel that creativity comes to you with a lot of effort, it is more likely that your creative ability is in a dormant state. Creativity works similarly to muscles in our body. When we use them all the time, the muscles are toned and fit. As soon as we stop exercising, the muscles become flabby and our body accumulates fat around them for protection. To have creativity easily accessible to us, we should use it on a regular basis. The more we use it in our daily life the easier it will flow.

5. Innovation is the domain of geniuses.

It is true that many of people whom we call geniuses are highly creative as well. It seems that because it comes so easily to them, they are almost blessed with special abilities. Behind every great innovation however, are many years of hard work. We often do not see this, but if you talk to anybody who truly succeeded, you will find out that they did so after many hardships and struggles.

6. I have to have brand new ideas in order for me to be considered creative.

This is the greatest secret that no creative professional talks about. “There are no new ideas!” Most great ideas are a combination of old concepts presented in a fresh, new package that provides us with a sense of novelty. There are exceptions when an idea is truly unique. Those do happen, but majority of creative endeavors are improving upon concepts that already exist or putting several old concepts into a new combination.

7. Brainstorming is hard work.

Yes, brainstorming can be, but it also can be a lot of fun. If one brainstorming technique isn’t working, all we have to do is try another one. As a matter a fact there are as many techniques to spark creativity as there are people who use them. For some people structured techniques work better and others perform best in a free flow atmosphere. The trick is to find one that works for you.

8. Only artists need to be creative.

I am an artist by background, and I was trained to think in creative terms. But I use creativity in almost all aspects of my life. I use it in cooking. I use it when I can’t figure out how a new high tech gadget that I purchased works. I use it to try and keep the relationship with my significant other fresh and inventive. I use it to come up with new business ideas, dealing with people, exercising … Oh yeah I also use it when I do art.

9. Writers block is a greatest obstacle in the creative process.

It is one of the obstacles, but not the biggest one. The biggest obstacle is when we deny this part of us totally. When we pay no attention at all to our creative ability, we literarily put it to sleep. It becomes extremely difficult for us to be creative. Inaction is a far bigger obstacle in the creative process and a more difficult one to overcome. As soon as we kick start our creativity, the more we use it the easier it comes to us.

10. Using structured creative techniques will hinder my ability to be creative.

Some brainstorming techniques are pretty complex. If this isn’t what you are comfortable with, and it isn’t giving you the results that you are looking for, do not use it. Find some other technique that you respond better to. And if you do like using more structured techniques, go ahead and continue using them. Since everybody is different, you have to find what works for you. There is no difference in the quality of one technique over another, only in the personality of the person who is using it. All brainstorming techniques do the same thing - spark your creativity.